Today's readings: heaven and hell are "states of mind"
rather than geographical locations; it may seem like living in a cave or in the woods would be a reflection of a "spiritual life;" however, it is in the trenches and challenges of everyday
life - where we have to get along with others whom we may not like or love - where our spirituality can be practiced.
Funny - I've thought both of these things before - especially the first one. The second one has been more than "thinking," but also has been experienced. And here's what I've noticed recently: that when I begin to curse more;
when I start having pretend conversations with people - out loud - where I am defending my position; when I feel resentment and a lack of motivation; then I have worked too much. It's
about more than a lack of motivation, but is also about not having (or taking?) the time to feed and nourish myself in the way that I like. It is about having too many things on my list that I "need" to do, and not having enough things on my list that I "want" to do.
Yep - right here. Right now. It's one of those times.
And here's another thought that I have had recently: the feeling of "God." The feeling of being totally loved, cared for, and connected to something bigger than myself. Isn't
that what it is like in the womb? There is a biological connection to something bigger than myself? And is this connection to "God," - to "Spirit" - more than our brain's distant biological memory of growing in the womb - of being connected to something and/or someone bigger than ourselves? And the caption in the pic - if you can't read it - is an imagined conversation between twins. It says "...do you think there is life after birth? Do you believe in Mom?" "Nah, I don't believe these things. I'm an atheist. I mean have you ever seen Mom?"
Well...there are twisted, imaginative minds like mine. I'm not feeling so alone.
And yet - some of us have the capacity to carry this feeling forward with us more so than others. I know this - this connection - on a very deep level. I know that my cousin Suzanne feels the same way...that my Gramma Lena felt this...How is that? That some - seemingly more so than others - have an ease with which that connection takes place?
Big questions for a Monday morning.
And needs on a Monday morning? There are the tasks: getting ready for Wednesday's meeting and this evening's teaching and many other things to numerous to mention.
I am also feeling that I want to exercise - a lot. And I want to camp - a lot. And I want to dig in the dirt on the hillside and plant flowers. And I want to clean my apartment. And I want to do many things that are not connected at all to the tasks.
And my alarm goes off. So - today - exercise first - maybe a run outside? Shower. Pray. Then head out for the day.
Whoops? I've got it backwards? Naahhhh....
