July 22nd: Francis Bacon, Ho'oponopono and Other Teachers

(P.S. written later: the formatting in this post has been a pain in the ass.  Please forgive the large spaces between paragraphs, and the sentences that looked fine on the draft, but were catiwampus when published. -dd)

Francis Bacon:  A long-time friend had a quote by Francis Bacon on the wall in a health food store he used to own.  I'm pretty sure it was only the first line of the quote you see here, as that was all he shared with me over the phone a day or so ago.  It fits.  This new accident in my body has something to teach me.  Quite honestly?  I never

expected my present path to be validated by Francis Bacon - who'd'a thunk it? - but I am grateful to Michael who shared it with me.  What can it tell me, this new accident in my body?

"Getting with" the "I feel health/I have cancer  thing" is quite the journey.  It can be difficult to understand, sometimes, this "non-dualism" that exists beyond the good and bad, the just and unjust.  Wrapping my mind around the "all is one" thing feels so accurate, and so easy, yet so difficult.  It's that wonderful paradoxical thing - again - you know, where I think, the Divine resides.  So this lymphoma is of me - and not me.  What can it tell me?  So far, all messages have been good.  When I told Michael something I'd written earlier, i.e., the cancer may just save my life, he replied that, well, it would provide me the opportunity to save my life.  Details, details…and yet there is power in words.  However it translates to English, I am grateful to have this opportunity that has been provided…truly…madly…deeply...

So, the non-dualism thing.  There is a belief out there that we are all connected - everything.  Supposedly, theoretical physics supports this.  There are pieces of me in every encounter that I have, pleasant or unpleasant.  There isn't a "good" and a "bad," but everything lumped in together.  Billy Jonas speaks to this in his song "This We Know" (http://www.billyjonas.com/index.php?page=songs&category=Get_Real_-oparen-for_adult-slash-general_audiences-cparen-&display=101) in which he addresses the miracles and catastrophes that we have performed, and are, as humans.  There is something about owning whatever pieces I have in me that can be or act in unjust ways, even though perhaps unknowingly, that is powerful.  Loving that which is difficult to like, much less difficult to love, is a challenge - especially when injustice is so flagrant.  I also find it challenging in relation to cutting myself a break, i.e., owning the more challenging stuff - yet reluctant to celebrate all that is good and holy and beautiful inside me.  It is in these difficult situations that I have found the Ho'oponopono prayer helpful.  There are four simple sentences:  "I'm Sorry.  Please Forgive Me.  I Love You. Thank You."  

Please forgive my feeble attempt to explain this.  I've misplaced my booklet (a $10 purchase which has already paid for itself, and please don't let that stuff in the title about "life's fulfillment" put you off: http://www.amazon.com/Hooponopono-Hawaiian-Forgiveness-Ritual-Fulfillment/dp/1844095975/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1406121155&sr=1-1&keywords=ho%27oponopono).  

It's really simple at its heart:  Whenever I run up against a difficult situation, I do my best to get to my heart space, from which I apologize for my piece of whatever is going on, and ask forgiveness.  Then I state my willingness to acknowledge the expression of the Divine in them through Love (with a capital "L" - the Universal kind, the kind from the Source), and then express gratitude for bringing this situation to my attention.  Here is a kicker, and maybe the hardest part: I let it go.  Surrender.  Very simple, yet difficult, especially in relation to forgiving myself.  When I read the section in my little book on self-love I cried like there was no tomorrow.  Yep.  I'd say that there's some

things to work through here, most likely at some deep, dark level that hasn't seen the light of day for awhile - if ever.  No biggie.  The time is now.  I am so very grateful for this opportunity. I am a Lucky Duck.

So - loving myself.  Forgiving myself for not showing up and being there more fully for myself;  for the inability to expect more or ask for more from those with whom I was/am engaged in relationship; for allowing others, in the name of compassion, to trespass on my goodness (see Pema Chrodin on Idiot Compassion: http://www.shambhala.org/teachers/pema/qa5.php);  for not knowing;  for my inability to see more clearly;  for neglecting myself in food, exercise, sleep, and love;  for holding onto that "pee" for 15 minutes more to finish that last paragraph, instead of getting up and walking to the bathroom when my body needed to go (um…excuse me for a few minutes, please).  

I'm sorry.  Please forgive me.  I love you.  Thank you.  And with that "Thank You," I let it go, go, go, repeating as often as is necessary until it is done, done, done - or until I'm bored and/or can't stand it anymore.  If the latter happens, I let that go, and trust that all will be well eventually - indeed, all is well now.    

I'm gathering people to be on my "resource team" in this "listening-to-Spirit-and-Body" think I'm doing these days.  I emailed one of them that I was going to do more of what brought me pleasure, and less of what didn't. 

The next email I received from him asked me this:  And what have you done today in support of that goal?  Whew!  Excellent!  

He took me to task!  

Today, so far, I sat and bounced on my gymnastic ball, sat in worship with my Spiritual Nurture Buddies, and wrote in this blog…you know…celebrated some of my "good stuff."  More fun to come...

Francis Bacon: http://izquotes.com/quotes-pictures/quote-despise-no-new-accident-in-your-body-but-ask-opinion-of-it-there-is-a-wisdom-in-this-beyond-francis-bacon-288801.jpg
Ho-oponopono book:  http://cdn.omtimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/hooponopono-book.jpg
lucky duck: http://www.easleys.com/ProductImages/mascottcostumes/22049%20luckyduck.jpg